Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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