I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
you didnt know i had herpes?
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
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