I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize