he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
