How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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