come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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