yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
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She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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