If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
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