drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize
