I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Randomize
