I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
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I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
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Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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