we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize