Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
