we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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