I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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