I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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