my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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