i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize
