i already hear my dad disowning me
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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