She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Randomize
