Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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