Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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