i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
