i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
But theres a keg here and me gusta
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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