While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Randomize
