just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
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