You really coming over, don't trick.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
no you cant smoke seaweed
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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