At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
