Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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