he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
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Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
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I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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