I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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