Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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