oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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