Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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