he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Randomize
