We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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