Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
So apparently I’m into choking now
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
