I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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