I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
