we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize