I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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