I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
