I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?