Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
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