I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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