Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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