Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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