Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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