Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize