Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
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